Wednesday, November 03, 2004

November 3, 2004 - Morning in America

Morning in America

Hello Thinkers!

Will Elizabeth Edwards please report backstage for a sound check? Your solo begins in 10 minutes. Tonight's dessert, humble pie ala mode, compliments of Crow's Eatery of Copley Square, will be served shortly.

Yes Thinkers, it is a highly caffinated "Morning in America." For some however, it is "Mourning in America." And a sweet one it is. It is time to reflect on just some of the history that was made in the past 24 hours.

George Soros spent $25M and got what? An ass whoopin'. His attempt to buy the election came up empty when the voters of fly-over country, the vast, vast majority of whom will never see his kind of wealth, told him to stick his wads of cash back - not in, but near his wallet. Being rich does not make you right. Maybe Teresa can give him some pointers on this lesson. Later though, she's still in class.

Tom 'The Gatekeeper' Daschle is going to have to warm up the tractor. But don't worry. If his crop fails next season, this "man of the people" can always rely on his wife's paycheck as a lobbyist for - get this, evil big business. In particular, this former Miss Kansas lobbies for the airline industry. You know, the companies that got a huge chunk of your money after September 11th. In fact one of her clients, American Airlines received over half a billion in cash grants - taxpayer funds - that it won't have to repay. Funny, I never heard Dan bin Rather talk about that.

Daschle isn't the only congressional democrat heading back to the farm. Republicans are looking at a gain of at least 2 seats in the senate at the time of this writing, maybe 4.

Even a ringing endorsement from Usama bin Laden could not move the electorate for Kerry. True to his Islamic principles, UBL used both the carrot and the stick, threatening "red" states with rivers of blood after November 2nd, and claiming "blue" states will have "chosen to make peace with us." This must be the support of unnamed foreign leaders Kerry spoke about during the campaign.

And true to his pacifist ways, Kerry took a poll to determine what to say about bin Laden's support. The last principle Kerry ever saw was in his boarding school.

Supporters of gay marriage took it in the shorts yesterday and surprisingly, didn't like it! Whoever got the gay marriage issue on the ballot is brilliant. I have to believe this topic, which was crushed in Kentucky, Georgia, Mississippi, Arkansas, Michigan, Mississippi, Montana, North Dakota, Oklahoma, Utah, and Oregon probably did more to energize the conservative base than any other ballot initiative. Ultimately, as one of The Thinkers pointed out to me this morning, we have the Massachusetts highest court to thank for this. To them, I express my gratitude - you fools.\Nation\archive\200411\NAT20041103a.html

However, Bush's victory of the electoral and popular vote (something Clinton never did) underscores, in my humble opinion, a microcosm of our society, the aging main stream media, and liberal arrogance. Now before I get in trouble, I am not saying all liberals are arrogant. I have several liberal friends - well, maybe not today, but eventually they will come back around after an appropriate period of sorrow - and they are not arrogant. What I am saying is that it feels real good to take the arrogant liberals and stick their heads in the toilet bowl of socialism and flush, like we did today. For your consideration I offer the following "swirlies" that I noticed.

First as I surfed between Fox News and the alphabet soup agencies, only Fox consistently used the term "President Bush." Bin Rather, Jennings, Brokaw, et al made reference to "Senator Kerry" and "Mister Bush." It is PRESIDENT BUSH you bitches! Get used to it!

Second, the media gleefully reported exit poll data supporting Johnny Hair. If you watched any of CBS' election coverage, this merriment turned to panic as bin Rather called Florida for Bush. His cadence put the pedal to the metal going through the math that might have kept Kerry alive. As the evening dragged on, bin Rather's face began to resemble the electoral map - mostly red, with blue ears.

Third, at about noon yesterday, the Dow was up over 100 points on the falling price of oil. Then as the exit polls showed Kerry momentum, all gains were lost. This was reported as "the markets reaction to uncertainty." Right! I think it was the markets reaction to Kerry socialism. Scuttlebutt from Wall Street indicates this as well. Funny how the DJI is up over 100 points on news of Kerry's concession. Must be that "certainty" thing again.

Fourth, Ted "Jabba the Hut" Kennedy predicted early a Kerry win in no uncertain terms. Hiding out in the Kerry bunker of Copley Square was no safe haven from the shock and awe of the Florida and Ohio JDAMs. Hopefully tears don't ruin the taste of vermouth. Drown, you pig!

And last, in a display of non-character that rivals his senate record of non-voting, Johnny Hair made his supporters wait outside in the cold rain for hours as the results came in. At 2:30 in the morning, he sent his lap dog, the boy blunder out to do his bidding while he was likely being soothed by Teresa's manly charm.

Holding on to hope and arrogance, some Kerry supporters waited out to the bitter end, like a woman from Ireland who told a reporter, "It clarifies the fact that American people aren't so smart. If I could, I would have voted for Kerry."\Politics\archive\200411\POL20041103d.html

And these people wonder why they cannot get the majority of American voters.

Well, Johnny Hair can take solace in one aspect of his loss. Now he doesn't have to make all those plans he kept talking about.

On to Fallujah!


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