Thursday, July 29, 2004

July 29, 2004 - The 2004 DNC Pukefest - Wrap Up

Today's Commentary: July 29th, 2004

Hello Thinkers!

Socialism - always a toilet.

Well this is it. After today, the great Marxist vomitorium formerly known as the Fleet Center will be shut down, hosed off, de-liced and returned to its role as a sports and entertainment facility. As I reflect on this grand socialist gathering I continually return to the same troubling question - what rock did all these people crawl out from under?

Not the people behind the podium, but the riff-raff in the crowd! The bizarre acts on stage paled in comparison to the footage of the great unwashed. What is up with those stupid hats?! If I were in charge of security, I'd be keeping the crosshairs on the delegates gracing the Fleet Center floor, not the protesters outside. Which reminds me, why is there so much security around the DNC? As I drove into work yesterday, I passed multiple groups of 7+ police cruisers parked on the side of I-93, over ten miles away from Boston. Why is all this security poised ready to strike? After all, Bush lied - right? There never were any WMD's in Iraq or elsewhere - right? There never was any pending danger to the US and our interests. Why not just have the perimeter security staff hand out daisies to all comers?

But now that Kerry's 'Extreme Makeover' is done, it is time to reflect on this tax subsidized boondoggle.

The first thing that I noticed missing at DNC-04 was the steady stream of former welfare recipients filling the stage. Surely there must be countless masses who had their livelihoods funded under eight years of Bill Clinton, pulled themselves up by their bootstraps and are now leading productive lives with 6-figure salaries and two hybrid cars in their garage. Where were they? I think that this would have been an effective rationale for the massive tax increases that a Kerry administration would implement.

I also found it endlessly ironic that on Tuesday, Barack Obama made the following statement: "Yet even as we speak, there are those who are preparing to divide us, the spin masters and negative ad peddlers who embrace the politics of anything goes. Well, I say to them tonight, there's not a liberal America and a conservative America -- there's the United States of America. There's not a black America and white America and Latino America and Asian America; there's the United States of America."

Yet the next day, John Edwards created division in our nation by describing two Americas - one for the rich and one for the poor. It looks like Barack and John did not compare notes. No problem! If the idiots at the Fleet Center are willing to go out in public with those stupid hats, I am certain they never gave a second thought to this minor conflict in principle.

And what of Mr. Edwards? Will he start channeling the voices of Osama bin Laden and Al-Zarqawi the same way he did channelled his child-clients as he was suing their doctors? This would be a huge help in the war against terror. Yet even John Kerry does not have much faith in John Edwards' experience with global issues. During the primary race, Kerry said to the NY Times:

"In the Senate four years - and that is the full extent of public life - no international experience, no military experience." He then added, smiling, "When I came back from Vietnam in 1969, I don't know if John Edwards was out of diapers then. Well, I'm sure he was out of diapers."

But that does not matter. A Kerry/Edwards administration will be handing over all of America's foreign affairs to the UN anyway, so we have nothing to worry about with respect to Edwards' lack of experience in foreign affairs.

However, imagine this nightmare post-January 2005 scenario. Vice-president John Edwards has championed legislation that allows for the creation of a new franchise, "The Litigation Hut." People go to the drive thru and fast-track lawsuits against every doctor in the US. The medical industry caves, creating a mass exodus of general practitioners and specialists from our country. John Kerry, sensitive to offshore outsourcing issues, goes to the last remaining plastic surgeon in California for his botox injections. The third rate (and third world) physician is an illegal alien allowed in the country as part of the "Come On In - We Don't Care Act" - Bush's spite-filled final executive order. Dr. Sanchez cannot read the warning labels before starting the injections. A horrible reaction to the combination of botox and Paul Mitchell hair care products lapses John Kerry into a fatal coma. We now have a career trial lawyer with one senate term and little else under his belt running the worlds' only remaining superpower. Give me Dick Cheney anytime!

And did you catch the verbal labyrinth that passed as Teresa's speech? Where was she going? And specifically, what was her point about how women's voices are held back? How about this sage snippet:

"This evening, I want to acknowledge and honor the women of this world, whose wise voices for much too long have been excluded and discounted. It is time for the world to hear women's voices, in full and at last."

I am certain that women in Afghanistan are thanking Allah that America finally took the initiative to give them a voice. And guess what Teresa, that happened under a Republican administration - not your precious UN. But she was probably more concerned with how women worth half a billion dollars are being treated by the press. Especially ones born with a silver foot in their mouth. OK Teresa, you made your point. Now shut up!

Of all the speeches and interviews I have seen since the pukefest began, the one that disappointed me the most was the highly trumpeted Michael Moore interview with Bill O'Reilly. It was hyped as "explosive" but it was at best, a dud. Moore only consented to an interview if O'Reilly promised not to edit it. Which is amazing since the "facts" that Mr. Moore presents are done so with deceitful editing, staged scenes and misleading information. Quick sidebar: This was most evident in "Bowling for Columbine" which showed Charlton Heston, speaking at a highly charged NRA event in Colorado shortly after the Columbine shootings. The viewer sees Heston rallying the troops in flagrant disregard of the tragic deaths only days before. Problem is, the video was of an NRA event thousands of miles away in Charlotte, NC - and a year later. A close look reveals that Charlton Heston's tie changes color during this segment. Moore is a liar and charlatan - plain and simple. End of sidebar.

However O'Reilly was pinned when Moore said "So, you would sacrifice your child to secure Fallujah?" Moore knew it and drove the point home. I will give credit where credit is due - Moore is many, mostly evil things, but he is a skilled debater.

Foolishly, O'Reilly accepted the premise as it was presented. It was truly a weak moment for Bill and I lost a lot of respect for him because of it. Especially after all the times he referred to Moore as a coward for not coming on his show.

So Bill, just in case you are reading this, here is what you should have said. Every one of our soldiers who paid the ultimate price in Iraq, Afganistan and anywhere else, did so protecting our nation. They are the only thing that stands between us and a collection of bastards who have decided that Allah wants us dead - all of us. We cannot expect France to protect us. While most of the rest of the world does nothing - or worse, our armed forces lead by example and are giving radical Islam the spanking it richly deserves. Every US serviceman lost, lessens the best citizens our country has to offer. To minimize their effort as just 'securing Fallujah' is a slap in their face and that of their families. But what should we expect from a self absorbed, Hollywood-elitist shyster.

Bill, you let me down.

Finally came John Kerry. The man who is only two neck-bolts away from being Herman Munster. He brought before the masses the usual string of villains - "the rich", corporations, and of course the anti-Christ himself - George W. Bush. Some of the most vocal support (other than calling healthcare a right - check your wallet at the door please) came from the "what if's", hearkening back on Americans who thought "what if" and created motorized flight, computers and other great inventions. But these advancements came from entrepreneurs operating in a free market, not because of any federal bureaucracy.

I like how Kerry appealed to Bush to call off the negative ads. Great idea since Kerry knows that George Soros will be picking up the slack with spots equating Bush with Hitler.

Make no mistake. Despite what you may, or more importantly may not have seen at the DNC, a vote for Kerry/Edwards is a vote to increase your taxes and to hand over our foreign policy to the UN.

And hey! I just learned that John Kerry served in Viet Nam... How about that?

Well thinkers, you won't be hearing from me next week. I'll be in Bermuda with my family. Maybe I'll be able to find one of those stupid DNC hats while I'm down there.

Bon Voyage!


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