Friday, November 19, 2004

November 19, 2004 - The Olive Branch

Today's Commentary: November 19th, 2004

Hello Thinkers!

After some false alarms, it looks like monday is the day we will be bringing another angry, white male into the world. Keep up the Thinking fight while I'm away. Enjoy your turkey, and remember our men and women overseas who will be keeping our holiday travels safe.

How about that UN huh? Like a weekend camper with a beer cooler at their side and not a shower in sight, even they can't take their own stink sometimes. A quick peek at the NY Times, Washington Post and other news sites showed no mention of this breaking story - now there's a shocker! I had to get this one from the pac rim:

We will have to see what comes of this, but don't expect to get any updates from Dan bin Rather. He's busy humping Clinton's leg over the new presidential library in Little Rock.

Keep an eye and ear out and notice how well some liberals are treating the recently nominated black, female Secretary of State. Here's a primer to get you started:

Now, which party is it that looks out for the best interests of minorities again? Where is the outrage from the NAALCP? or the National Organization of Whiners?

Lastly, I submitted the following letter to my local paper, The Lawrence Eagle Tribune for their letters to the editor section. They have printed all my previous submissions with some minor edits. I suspect they will do the same with this. It may be time to take out insurance on my mailbox.

Most people end their holiday letters by wishing you "peace." Since you all are Thinkers and can appreciate the difference, I will wish you something better...


Ever since John Kerry's concession speech, liberal Democrats and the media elite have opined that President Bush needs to extend an olive branch to the party that lost senate seats, house seats and the white house in the 2004 election. Examples of how to do this correctly include nominating moderate to liberal justices for SCOTUS, adopting policies that were rejected by the majority of voters and appointing Cabinet members that would provide "balance." Funny, I never recall hearing a similar appeal to balance Clinton's Cabinet. Be that as it may, I would like to extend my own olive branch to these same media and Democrat elites as a way to heal our nations ideological chasm. In addition, I too would like to make some requests.

Please continue to think that my opposition to the redefinition of marriage, an institution which has not deviated for thousands of years, means that I am a lynching homophobe that would march all gay people to a gas chamber, given the chance. Please continue to believe that I know no gay people that I would call a friend.

Please continue to believe that you know how to spend my money better than I do.

Please continue to think that because I oppose partial-birth abortions and non-parental notification for minors seeking an abortion that I would ban all abortions in all circumstances. Please also continue to believe that I am a Bible-thumping Christian that postulates all non Christians will go to hell - not because of their actions, but because they do not share my faith.

Please continue to believe that the democrats resounding loss is because they have not moved to the left far enough. Please continue moving in that direction. The cliff is way, way off in the distance. Trust me.

Please select Howard Dean to replace Terry McAuliffe as the head of the DNC. Please continue to exclude Joe Lieberman from any real shot at the presidency.

Please continue to support Tom Daschle in his efforts to block President Bush's judicial nominees. Oops, never mind.

Please continue to describe the US Marine in Fallujah who shot an unarmed, injured terrorist as a war criminal, despite the fact that booby-trapping the dead and wounded in Iraq is common practice. Please also continue to hold John Kerry in high regard for shooting a lone, fleeing, teenage Viet Cong in the back.

Please continue to refer to the radical Muslims in Iraq who behead civilians and who executed aid worker Margaret Hassan as "rebels" and US troops as "occupiers."

Please continue to lionize Michael Moore, and hold him in a position of reverence in the Democratic party.

Please continue to believe that law abiding citizens have no right to defend themselves against armed criminals.

Please continue to believe that on the night of November 1st, Vice President Cheney rose from his coffin in the 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue bunker, turned into a bat, and flew to Ohio and Florida to sabotage the voting machines.

Please continue to think that Teresa Heinz would have made a swell first lady.

Please continue to believe that because I voted for President Bush, I am a knuckle dragging idiot without a shred of common sense. And that because of my selfish vote, I have denied the world a flood of stem cell based miracle cures for everything from AIDS to paralysis.

But most of all, please, please, please continue to believe that arrogance is a desirable characteristic which will continue to serve you well in 2008.


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